Anything, Everything
I love drawing animals, or painting them as its usually the case. I think they’re not only fascinating to study, they also very relaxing. The more complex, the better. Birds are my favourite, and I didn’t discover painting birds until the beginning of lockdown when I painted some for a local care home. I think they’re ideal for any skill, and it opens up an area of study you may not have realised could be fascinating, if only to examine how intricate their patterns are.
So today has been a rubbish weather day, so I thought I’d share my latest little painting of a nearby wooded area by my parents’ house. Sometimes if you can’t find it, create your own.
I started last year with so many plans. I guess different goals to what I actually ended up doing, but still, last year could have gone a very different way. Concerts, festivals, travelling… basically everything I resolved to do, or usually do anyway, was cancelled. As a frequenter of Download Festival and person who loves to travel, last year sucked a bit on that part. My second missed opportunity to see Iron Maiden, and now I wonder whether its meant to be.
And while so many expect (an expectation fueled by wishful thinking, perhaps) to be in the midst of a moshpit during the summer months of 2021, I kind of trust that they’ll be disappointed. While so many concerts are covid safe, a festival in which communal toilets and general suspension of usual hygiene standards are perhaps a staple of the weekend experience, the pressure to lock onto the virus will inevitably lead to further cancellations. So, what to do?
I dont want to end this year disappointed, as so many have. And, usually, I dont make what might be traditionally termed as resolutions. But I do like goals. I see both sides of the coin. I like doing things there and then, but I also like putting a time stamp on achievements. I like to look back on the year and think of what I did with my 365 days, and last year was no different. There was a tremendous amount I couldn’t do, but in a way, maybe thats why I did the stuff I actually did. So this year, I want to make a point of setting goals I know will be achievable, even during these enduringly uncertain times.
1. Read more – I read a ton, but it could always be a bit more varied. I’ve recently gotten into dystopia fiction, so maybe a wider scope is on the horizon yet.
2. Learn to play guitar – this has been a goal of mine since 14, but there’s always something else to do. But I want to get out of this year with at least one song learned that isn’t Metallica related.
3. Watch more films – I love my movies. Often movie lovers (from my personal experience) have been judged as couch potatoes. But I’m the best at movie quizzes, if I do say so myself.
4. Run 15km – last year I reached 10, and kind of just stuck to 5 after that.
5. Finally achieve side splits – yoga has been a bit intermittent this year. But now I have the space to do it, so no excuses
6. The three peaks challenge – this was last year’s goal, and the one that didn’t come to fruition. Scafell, Snowdon and Ben Nevis. I’ve done the later two at very different times, so I’d like to make all three.
7. Try self publishing – gotta start somewhere right?
8. Paint more for pleasure – last year I took on a lot of commissions. So many that, while I enjoyed painting members of peoples family, it took the creativity out of me a bit.
9. More photography – I got into taking photos last year, specifically of simple pleasures. Flowers, the sky, the butterfly heading this post. I’d love to have canvases of them.
Were going into this year with a bit of an advantage, if that’s the right word. We know to treat it with caution. We know not to make plans, or at least, we know what plans not to make. This year could still pan out in so many ways, good or bad, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t count, right?
If there’s one phrase I keep hearing, its “I can’t wait for 2020 to be over” and the like. And yes, I get that. Its been a turbulent year. But the reality is that the pandemic will not be limited to 2020. In fact, the pandemic for many parts of the world began before 2020. Today, I wondered whether I’d still be judging people for not wearing a mask or standing 2 meters apart in a year’s time. It feels like second nature now, to distance and mask up each time I’m in a shop, and sneer at those for not doing so. Its been a unique year, to say the least.
But does that mean its write off? For many who have lost loved ones, who have been isolated, or who have faced this pandemic from the front line, perhaps that is the case. 2020 for many has, in short, been an absolute shit storm. Redundancies, job losses, cut backs, companies closing because they cannot fund running in the midst of a virus that results in reduced custom. But for the rest of us, 2020 has meant more time with family, working in the comfort of our jammies, and having just that little bit more time to take stock of our mental and physical health. Rather than declare 2020 as just a year that shouldn’t count, I’m taking it from my privileged position as a period in history in which I was there. Taking the good with the bad.
So what has 2020 been to me? And yes, I’m focusing on the positives. There’s too much negativity in the world to begin with.
2020 has meant branching out. More and different books, trying a few different crafts, watching a few different films. TV shows I’ve never thought about watching before. Having that time has meant not being too tired after a day’s work to do anything more than flopping on the sofa to watch the same old same old.
2020 has meant more time for education. I started and finished (and passed) my first module for my masters degree. Due to working from home, my lunch breaks and down time were filled with essays and reading as opposed to mindless scrolling through my phone.
2020 has meant fitness goals. Back in March I ran my first 10km, as I was meant to be doing a charity 10k elsewhere. Instead, I did it on my own, on a treadmill, in my living room, with a virtual tour of Vienna on the go on my TV. I’ve also been working more on my yoga, and I’m sure I’ve progressed (somehow).
2020 has meant more painting. Art has been in my life since my first bronchiosaurus drawing at the age of 5. But this year I’ve done many more commisions than usual, and its given me the chance to develop. I’ve painted birds and babies for the first time. Turns out I’m not too shabby if I do say so myself.
2020 has meant new experiences. I’ve never worked from home before, and I do quite like it. I passed my 1 year anniversary at my job on the 18th. Its also given me the drive to take my first long weekend trip on my own, which was not only greatly needed, but a big kick in my confidence of my own independence too.
2020 has meant moving out – last week, I moved in to an apartment with my fiance. A couple of arguments with the company selling us our table later (a further couple about the broadband) and I think we’re actually formulating a home.
2020 has, in short, meant progress. I’m a true believer in baby steps, that progress counts everywhere, and can happen anywhere. If you’re reading this, you have survived this pandemic so far. Maybe you’ve partaken in the plays streamed on YouTube, taken up a long distance course to pass the time. Maybe you’ve used your time to learn a few guitar chords. Whatever this year has been, its been an experience. Whether good or bad, we’re still here.
Merry Chrimbo and a Happy New Year
Xx
When it comes to being an artist, I’m not a fan of social media. If you read my views concerning Instagram and using it to get follows and likes, you probably gathered this already. But, in a climate of so many creaters, its probably crossed your mind once or twice to just down tools, and find something else to do. Or, maybe you’ve been tempted to sacrifice what makes your work unique for something more uniform, more sharable. More potentially viral.
This has happened to too many. Sometimes, a born artist just isn’t a born advertiser of their own work. Maybe modesty gets in the way, or the paranoia that many will say you think you’re better than you are puts you off. For me, self promotion is just a nightmare, and I can’t do it. I can’t be one of those people who sends out their own work to the personal accounts of potential audience members. I tried it once to see how it went, and I just felt like a double glazing sales person.
On the flip side, I also question why being an artist means, to other people, that you should get your art out there. Now, hear me out. I know what you’re thinking, what is the point? What is the point in creating artwork if you’re the only person who sees it, or at most, the friends and family who follow you on your Facebook page?
The thing is, self promotion can be exhausting. I’ve said it before, I think some artists *ahem content farms ahem* but more effort into social media and making sharable content than actually putting effort and passion into their work. Its disheartening to say the least, but you shouldn’t stop.
So why should you keep creating, even if you don’t want to advertise?
1. Its nice to have a talent – I love creating. Its something I’ve always done, and it’s one source of self pride I have when I feel a bit rubbish. Whether it’s painting, sketching or pottery, I’ve always found myself feeling much better after doing something; as long as you like it and feel proud, what else matters?
2. An outlet – creating can relieve stress. Whether its a mindful exercise or just something to take your mind away from something causing you anxiety, having that time away to just make something with your own skill can be highly cathartic.
3. It doesn’t mean you can’t make money – over the last few months I’ve had a few commissions; birds, family portraits, and pet portraits. Sometimes, family can be very useful for singing your praises, and soon the requests start rolling in.
4. Its not how it used to be – one of the most widely used anecdotes artists use to console their lack of sales is that Van Gogh sold one painting in his lifetime, to a man called Julien Tanguey. But we are not in Van Gogh’s lifetime, and now, so many styles and methods are accepted that if Van Gogh were of today’s generation, his success may have been different. Who knows. Its mere speculation. But, again, there’s just so many artists battling for follows, recognition, views… who knows whether Van Gogh’s work would have been so unique and distinctive in today’s climate?
5. It might happen one day, so keep going – as arduous as it might be, if you’re that sure you want to get recognition, then just keep going. Stick to your principles and style, don’t be afraid to try new things if that’s what you want to do. Work up your portfolio, and stay true to yourself. Utilise your imagination. Sometimes, all it takes is one person to stumble across you.
6. You can still inspire – a couple of months ago, I went to London in something I can only describe as escaping. I just felt generally rubbish, and needed a change of scenery, people, all that. One day, I was walking around a very quiet National Gallery, and got a ping through Facebook. Someone had spotted the below painting on a page, and she was asking permission to try and recreate it. It was a lovely moment, and I was more than happy to give permission.
I’ve been drawing, painting, sketching literally since I was a kid. When I was 5, I drew a dinosaur from a book, and I was so proud of it I glued it to my dad’s birthday card. That was all I needed. As long as I was proud of what I’d done, that was enough.
However, today is a different day. Art is something wider, further reaching, than it used to be. Today, we often judge our talent by the number of likes we get on a post on Instagram. We judge our capabilities on the number of followers we have.
But more doesn’t always mean better.
Now, don’t get me wrong. There’s some wonderful, talented artists out there, and their work speaks for itself.
And then there’s Follow for Follow.
So a few weeks ago I decided I wanted to get my work out there a bit more. More often that not, I’m content with creating at my own pace, when the moment strikes.
But sometimes, I wonder what the point of creating is if no one’s seeing what I’m creating. Essentially, its an argument at the root of most, if not every creator since creating began. To be seen, to be approved… to make money.
And this was how I learned about follow chains (probably the term, but self explanatory). Basically, you added yourself to a list and sent it to a number of people, who were meant to do the same in some context. Or, you’d post your account link to Facebook groups and promise to follow back. I found out that many people probably put more effort in this part than the actual creating.
Now, it did work a bit. But it didn’t feel good. I knew that these people weren’t looking at my work, which was what I wanted. That’s all we all want, really. But numbers talk.
I want to say that I’m not judging these people. The Internet is so full of creations that we have to come up with ways just to be seen. But what I dont like is the sense of failure that comes with it, and the disappointment of not being seen more.
I had to take a social media break after that stint. It was disheartening, seeing so many sacrifice their creativity, their originality, for something sharable. Something that was going to be approved of, understood instantly, something in the hope of getting likes and followers. Art, to me anyway, should be a projection of oneself. Or, it should be something we are ultimately proud of by ourselves. Regardless of social media performance. If we haven’t got pride in ourselves, what is it worth?
Paint a Mental Picture 